However, there was something “off” about this particular poster…
BEER…helping..?asian? people have sex since 1862!
Hi there
What are some good stuff to ask out / talk about when you hit a blank when chatting with a girl on a date?
Sometimes it’s better to say anything than to say nothing at all…
Maybe list a few “different” / interesting questions / topics…
Thanks a lot for all the advice!
Jakes
ANSWER:
Jakes,
Great question.
Hitting that blank is very common…and most of the time…un-avoidable. Sometimes it can be very very awkward…
The important thing to remember is to stay calm. Don’t freak out. When you’re nervous, your nervous thoughts make that awkward silence feel like an eternity….
The beauty of the awkward silence is this:
She feels awkward too!
Most guys start thinking something must be wrong if there is a little bit of silence.
There’s not….trust me.
A minute or two of silence is no biggie.
Here are some tips that I like to keep in mind:
Before your date…think of different scenarios that will be able to start up a conversation just incase you run into awkward silence.
For example, chances are she’s going to be wearing some piece of jewlery…right?
If you hit awkward silence…pick out a piece of jewlery or an item of clothing that she’s wearing and say something to the effect of -
“Hey i like that bracelet…where did you get it??”
Chances are, this will be enough to get her to tell you a story about where she got her bracelet…or how she picked out her shirt..etc etc…
Like I mentioned in earlier tips…Girls LOVE talking about themselves…so LET them..
Ask questions…
Then reply to her answers with stories about yourself….
Perhaps have a story about where you got your necklace…or your shirt..
Make a couple of jokes..
Tell her you saw a bum wearing the shirt you have on now…and you bought it from him for 5 bucks…
Get her laughing a little.
A couple of jokes…and a little bit of laughter eases the tension and gets the conversation rolling.
Think of a few “safety topics” before your date to talk about for when you run into silence.
Good Topics:
Siblings
Movies
Whether or not she likes sports
Music
TV
Hobbies
Bad Topics:
Sex
War
Drugs
Your longest Keg Stand at last weekend’s Frat Party
Your Ex..
Hope this helps, buddy.
]]>We all like to think that we’re big deals. Maybe you are….maybe you aren’t.
Just make sure you don’t start lying about yourself.
Common sense should tell you to not to say you own a Maserati when you don’t. You can only lie about it being “in the shop” for so long before she calls you on your bullsh*t…
If she tells you she loves John Mayer, don’t tell her you know a guy that can get her backstage at his next show.
If she tells you she loves France, don’t tell her you own a summer house in St. Tropez…
If she loves going clubbing, don’t tell her you can skip the line at the most exclusive club in the city..
You see where I’m going with this??
While it may seem cool at the time…what are you gonna do if you two actually start dating seriously?
Are you going to continue to lie? Are you going to come clean and admit you were just being a D-bag?
Save yourself the trouble, man. Be yourself. Be comfortable in what you have to bring to the table. You don’t need to lie about yourself to impress anyone.
You are trying to find someone who will like you for who you are….not what she can get from you…
Please read it….and maybe it will convince you to stop being so needy…and learn how to take your time with women..
Man, I would hate to be this guy….haha.
If you ask a female expert, she’ll tell you to always pay.
If you ask some male experts…they’ll tell you not to be a wuss and split the bill 50/50.
There are a lot of different theories floating around on this one…
If you want my opinion…
I say, be classy. Pay for the first date.
I always suggest to have a creative first date that doesn’t even involve a bill…
But in the event that you go on a more traditional date…..then go ahead and pay.
I’ve always paid for my dates…..
And I’ll tell you why…
If you’ve done everything right on the date thus far….and you’ve been a funny, charismatic, confident guy throughout the date…
Then it really doesn’t matter if you pay for everything or you just pay your half.
BUT…in the event that you’re out on a date with an “old school” girl who likes a chivalrous man…then you footing the bill is just a cherry on top of a good date.
Even if you don’t see yourself going out on another date with this girl….still take the high road.
After all….you invited her right??
One of my favorite tests to see if this chick is worth my time…comes at the end of the night…
I automatically grab the bill….if she offers to pay her half…then she’s solid.
If she doesn’t…or worse yet…doesn’t even say thank you…
Then you run, pal…..and you run fast…
Unless you met this girl on adultfriendfinder…or you are answering her craigslist ad for bondage sex…
Then you really shouldn’t talk about all the nasty things you would like to do to her…
It’s ok to flirt heavily and perhaps drop some funny sexual innuendo….but don’t overdo it.
She doesn’t want to hear about all the disgusting thoughts you’re having.
She wants to know you’re a cool guy…who is not too overeager to hop in bed…and who thinks she’s more than just a piece of meat.
Classic rule:
If she thinks you’re too eager to sleep with her….it’ll turn her off.
This happens for many reasons…
One of them being that if you seem too eager…she’s going to assume that you getting laid only happens once in a blue moon.
So if you can’t get chicks…..why should she settle for you?
Women want what other women have.
I don’t care if you haven’t gotten some in a year….
Act as if you can get it any time you want. Act as if it’s no big deal to you.
Be laid back.
Relax.
Stay cool….
Make her work for it….
Be unlike every other guy…
And I promise….she’ll never leave you alone…
You’re walking her to her doorstep because you’re a classy guy…
And you’re patting yourself on the back…
Not because you thought the date went well…..
But rather, because you managed to refrain from running out of the coffee shop and jumping in front of a bus to escape being around such an annoying person…
I know, I know…I’m being harsh here. But we’ve all been there before..
(And don’t kid yourself, fellas…not every girl you’ve been on a date with thought you were God’s gift to women..)
The point is, some dates end up being winners…some dates end up being duds..
One thing if for certain…not every girl you go out on a date with will mesh with your personality.
That being said….
If you have no intention of calling her….don’t say you will.
Be a stand up guy, kiss her on the cheek, tell her it was really nice to meet her, and then be on your way..
She should get the message.
There’s no reason to lead her on. You wouldn’t want a chick to do it to you…would ya?
Save both her and yourself a lot of time…and keep it real.
]]>It’s ok to drop the occasional swear word here and there while you’re out on a date…but for the most part, clean it up.
There’s a difference between having an edge and dropping F-bombs on your dinner date for the whole restaurant to hear…
Don’t let your date get the wrong idea of you. You only get one first date….
And unless she wants to date a sailor…she’s probably not going to be impressed by you if every other word coming out of your mouth would make a nun have a heart attack…
Believe me guys…this may sound a bit prudish…
But you just gotta control yourself a little.
Women love James Bond…
But do you ever hear James Bond raving about how “f*ckin great the motherf*ckin’ chicken is in this motherf*ckin’ restaurant!”
No…you don’t.
Be classy.
Save the Samuel L. Jackson talk for later on in the relationship..lol.
